How much we love each other
What we think are low blows
How much we want each other
How much we are about ourselves
how much we admire each other
how much we can and actually make each other happy
how much resentment there is
how much my success as a person is dependant on our working
appropriate everyday vehicles
how much we pursue our dreams
when i first met u i was a wreck. I had no dreams. You came into my life and i saw a future for myself, happiness. You gave me dreams. it was simple. but through the years i grew up, with u to hurt in the process. i can never take back the pain i have caused. And i am learning i cannot be forgiven. because of me, my pitfalls, and inability to make us come true per our dreams.. I will never be able to live and learn. For as long as I am with you, I will always have to be sorry. I believe we're ruined. Our future is forever tainted.
and to think. I am excited for my parent's encouraging a marriage?? I love you so much, I am willing to agree to a life with someone who will never fully love me because of the mistakes I've made? The idea that I don't care, how it happens, It'd allow us to just move forward and live our lives. I was excited for it. You may not think this, but they are just facilitating a bad break up that's bound to happen years from now. Because I am submitting my love to someone who I have to work for to love me back? We truly believe we love each other. We cry for each other. The thought of not being together tears us apart. I would've given my life for you. But even that, wouldn't have been enough. We were doomed from the beginning, we came from the too different families and systems. You were raised to think you're forever awesome. And I was raised weak to criticism. And to think, we met in church.
I wish all of this weren't true, I wish something would change it all
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